My mother, who is 56 years old and postmenopausal in real life, gave birth to an eerily clean baby after showing no signs of pregnancy. The OBGYN, my friends, and I gathered around her third-world hospital cot and cheered her on during her short and relatively painless labor. She heaved a few times then shot the baby out of her vagina with one long scream. The baby did not cry but seemed perfectly alive and content. I marveled at the cleanliness of the entire process until I realized that babies should be born amidst blood and grossness. I also did not think to take note of the baby’s sex. Checking out baby genitalia is not my thing.